If you hadn't heard by now... today is the day to
SPREAD THE WORD TO END THE WORD. That word is Retard and Retarded. We call it the R word. The principal at my kids' school (TK to 8th gr) asked me to speak to the student body today... all in all about 250 students.
I gave this presentation two times today, March 3, 2010. The first talk was geared toward TK (transitional Kindergarten) to 3rd grade students. The second talk, which are the slides below, was for 4th through 8th grade. Since my kids go to a Catholic school, I included the faith component on a few slides.
Both presentations went very well -- the students were quiet, attentive, and asked great questions. One of my favorite questions from the older kids was, "How did you feel when the doctor told you John Michael had Down syndrome?" I answered honestly and told her I was very sad and afraid, but the doctor told me to love him like I would any of our other kids and in time I would learn about Down syndrome and what it meant for our family.
I was asked about John Michael's life expectancy, whether I thought he would go to college or marry, what kind of learning problems would he have, what other health problems do people with Ds have, why is it called "Down syndrome", and why am I pregnant. That came from a young student... I thought it was funny. One girl asked if John Michael got more attention than kids like her. I smiled and told her, "YES! But that's because he's got the cuteness thing going for him right now. I wonder how many people will pay attention to him when he's an adult and they look at his face and decide they don't want to talk to him." That's why I'm doing this... to hopefully smooth out an easier path for John Michael and his buddies. Only time will tell. One boy asked me why there were blue dots on my slides. OK, so not all the questions were fantastic, but in general, the kids kept raising their hands and I finally had to stop them.
After discussing Down syndrome and the dignity and value of each person, I spoke about the R word... emphasizing that we need to make "respect" the new R word. I think most of the kids got it and afterwards I invited them to sign posters I'd made up with the r-word.org graphics. After Q&A, I invited John Michael to come up and say 'hi'. Nic brought him up and John Michael smiled and waved at everyone. Many kids got up and crowded around JM to give him high fives. It was very cute. Then he would walk away and they would literally chase him to be with him. And, yes, he put on his cuteness big time!
I am posting my slides, but I ask that you not use them without my permission. I put A LOT of time and effort into this presentation, neglecting my family's needs for many nights... but I do want to share the content with you. If you want to use my information, great... but please do not use any of my personal photos. My daughter, Anna's constructive criticism was that I should've included more faces/ages of Ds. I agree. Nic also said it would be nice to incude well-known people with Ds, like Chris Burke or others that really stand out as self-advocates. Another good idea. This talk was a starting point. The feedback has been great so far. The video clips were really what tied it all together and made it a much more interesting and relevant presentation.
I guess the saddest part of the day was when the kids and I were all settled in the car and ready to go home. Anna said a girl sitting behind her whispered "Retard" through most of my talk. I wasn't surprised by that particular girl, but it still bothers me. And someone else heard the "R" word within 5 minutes of my talk finishing. Those kids don't get it... YET! I hope they grow out of their immaturity or perhaps that one of their friends will have the courage to ask them to stop saying it. We'll see...
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